When you were nothing more than a microorganism, I gave you parts of myself, so you could grow into a human form. I gave you space within my body, within my heart and within my soul. I gave you my blood and energy. I gave you life so you could be you.
After you entered the world I gave you the right to suck your life’s sustenance out of me, eagerly, and proudly. I gave you the biggest part of my life, a solid 20 years, feeding you, nurturing you, caring for you, helping you grow into what you are today. In the process I gave you my time, I gave up my pleasures, my dreams, so I could make space to accommodate yours.
When you ripened into a young adult, although it ripped my heart to part, I gave you the right to flutter your wings and fly the skies. I gave you the freedom without giving you an inkling on what it meant to have an empty nest. I continued giving you strength and support wherever you were and giving you love without you ever having to ask for it.
I have given you my all, but that doesn’t mean i will redeem what I have given. Ever. It also does not mean that I will exercise control your life, how should you live, whom should you marry, which God you should pray or how many children you should bear. To each his own life. I, hopefully, have also given you the confidence to live your life the way you want to and take responsibility of the subsequent consequences.
BUT.
Giving is a two way game, my dear.
While I won’t expect anything from you, I will hope you will give my motherhood the acknowledgement it deserves.
While I don’t expect or want money from you, I hope you will give me the pleasure of hearing your voice as often as possible.
While I am only too happy to hand over the reins of the household to you and your partner, I hope you will give me, or any other senior person visiting you, the dignity that should be accorded for that age, hope that you will look forward to waiting on me, as I waited on you once.
Not because I want to rule and command, but because I want to feel loved and cared. And not because I am a needy old witch who can’t let go of her offspring, but because as a human being, that is the right thing to do.
While I won’t occupy your home and be a hindrance to your lifestyle – I am my own person and I want to live my own life – I hope you will give me the space and appreciate the fact that you and me are both mature adults now, and I have the right to live where I want, how I want to, visit who I want to.
For, my sweet, giving is a two way game.
This post has been written as part of the A-Z Challenge. Do keep visiting this blog on more gyan on life and my perception of it, all this month.
Perfect, Yamini! I somehow feel sad reading this! Sad reality, I guess!
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True Shalini. In one way or the other, every family faces this gripe.
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Love the title, couldn’t agree more with it. And your post was very moving.
My link: http://www.devikafernando.com/blog/blogging-from-a-to-z-challenge-letter-g-good-enough
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Thanks Devika.
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This is a lovely post. Very touching. I am a recent mother and can this relate to the first part. I make sure that my parents enjoy being grandparents, and of necessary I would take care of them, but hopefully this will only be in a long time as they are still young.
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I too am a relatively young mother, but my words are borne out of my observation of the people around me, in the hope, that when time comes, they will steer me in the right direction. Thank you for visiting, Solveig.
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I believe that if you show a good example, then there are good chances that yes.
You are welcome, have fun with the challenge.
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Not only did I enjoy your post, as a mother who has children who have left the nest, but the photo. The photo is beautiful and speaks to a parent’s soul. Thank you so much for your thoughts and the image I will take with me. Lisa, co-host AtoZ 2015, @ http://www.lisabuiecollard.com
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Hi Lisa, glad you enjoyed it. I still have some time to go before my boy leaves the nest, but the post was an outcome of seeing other mothers dealing with the empty nests, around me.
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